Meteors: Chapter Seven - Sacrifices

White envelopes and letter on a wooden table. - Credit to Mikhail Nilov on Pexels

Read Chapter Six here.

Read Chapter Eight here.

It was the last Friday that Ivona would be with them and Owain was trying to make it the best Friday she had ever known. They’d spent the last week meeting up with all of Ivona’s friends families, and she’d spent the last night having a sleepover with her best friend, Milly, she was also being evacuated. All kids under the age of eighteen were being sent away this time, and several men in the town had been called up, at least one per family, not the McCrawleys though. Not yet.

               Everything had been packed up, and they were now just wandering around the town. They’d gone to the park and the library, they’d let her browse the toy and magazine aisles all she wanted at the local shops, and were now just coming out of the sweet shop, Ruth having paid for some of Ivona’s wishes because Ivona had learnt that all she needed was to give Ruth a wide-eyed look with a little pout, and the girl would fold and give her what she wanted. Ruth had filled her head with stories of Ohlendia and travelling, though Ruth had travelled by plane, not boat. She’d helped make sure that Ivona had everything she would need to get accustomed to living in such a different country to their own.

               Owain was a little distracted, though still held tightly onto Ivona’s little hand. Right before they’d left a letter had arrived for him and he hadn’t read it yet. He wondered if it was from the army, calling him up to fight.

               “Where now?” Ruth asked, bringing Owain out of his own head.

               “What do you want to do?” He asked, smiling down at Ivona, who was happily attacking a colourful, and classically disc shaped lollipop. She bit it thoughtfully.

               “I wanna go home,” Her eyes misted slightly, “I won’t see it for a while.”

               “Would you want a piggyback?” Ruth offered, and Ivona lit up.

               “Yes, yes, yes!” She exclaimed excitedly, barely waiting for Ruth to squat down before clambering up, and wielding her lollipop like sword, “Onwards!” Ruth started galloping forwards, and Owain watched as Ruth smiled, and Ivona giggled away. While he admired and enjoyed the company of Ruth, he hoped that Ohlendia wouldn’t do the same thing to Ivona that it had done to Ruth. While she loved the Nitlome, it was clear that her time there had scarred her seemingly beyond recovery. All he could do was pray that Ivona would be alright.

               Ruth tapped in the code for the flat to let them in, he’d taught it to her a few days before, and succeeded in carrying Ivona piggyback all the way up the stairs to his and Ivona’s front door. Owain unlocked the door and as Ruth charged Ivona into the living room and collapsed the two of them onto a sofa, Owain swiped up the letter for him, and tore it open as quickly as he could. He only needed to read the first paragraph to confirm his beliefs. It was him. He was the McCrawley going to war.

               “Owain?” He heard, Ruth had stepped out of the living room and was looking at him with her head tilted as she did when she was confused, “You look ashen, are you okay?” She asked. Owain took a quick glance in the hallway mirror and saw himself that all the blood had seemed to have drained out of his face. He put the letter down.

               “I’m just worried about Ivona,” He said, “You think she’s going to be okay?”

               “Of course she it. She’s got a phone now anyway, it’s not the 1940’s anymore,”

You seem to love destruction! He remembered Ruth saying, You just blind yourself to it and then walk in it’s direction with no discretion. Don’t you have any self-preservation instincts? Maybe not, but he did have an instinct to protect the people he cared about, and that included not telling Ruth he’d been conscripted until it was too late for her to worry about it.

“Come on, she’s asked for ice cream, and I don’t know if you even have any.” Ruth interrupted his thoughts. He liked that she did that. Whether she knew it or not, she always seemed to step in when he was spiralling, this strange woman, “So, what you got, vanilla or chocolate?” He gave Ruth an odd look. “What?”

“You do know there are more than two flavours, right?” Ruth blinked at him twice, a clear sign that this pretty much Ohlendian girl was not aware that there were more than two flavours of ice cream. He started walking towards the kitchen. Ruth caught up, walking beside him.

“Of course, what do you have?” She asked in a tone that did not sound as confident as her words implied. They turned into the kitchen

“Salted caramel, that’s Ivona’s favourite, vanilla, chocolate, dad likes strawberry and my personal favourite is pumpkin.” Owain said. He figured that pumpkin might be a flavour somewhere, he’d never heard about it. Ruth nodded sagely, like she’d heard of all of these, though she wasn’t doing well at hiding an odd expression on her face. “What’s your favourite?” The expression on her face became more twisted. He opened the freezer and started the guesswork of figuring out which drawer had the ice cream in it.

“I think Salvini.”

It was Owain’s turn to stop what he was doing and blink slowly.

“As in one Kailix's consuls?” There were two leaders for Kailix that worked together and one of them had become well known in recent years for his approach to the war, Robert Salvini.

“Yup. There was this family with the Nitlome who ran an ice cream stall, and one of the flavours was concerningly bright blue and labelled Salvini,” The odd look on her face was revealed to have been her trying not to laugh, “I can’t believe I got you,” She was smiling. Actually smiling. Owain shook his head to stop himself from staring at that wonderful sight.

“Ha ha, very funny,” he deadpanned, “Ice cream called Salvini, very funny,” He found the ice cream in the bottom drawer, and knelt down to pull out the vanilla and the salted caramel.

“Oh no, that wasn’t the joke, that was real. You really think we didn’t have other ice creams in Ohlendia? In a country where cold foods are the best treats possible?”

“I don’t know, I’ve never been to Ohlendia,” He closed the freezer door and stood up, placing the tubs on the table, “Could you grab some bowls down?”

“We’re not as primitive as people seem to think. The next person who asks me if I had to deal with lion attacks, I am going to skin – llfully tell them that that is a misunderstanding,” She passed him the bowls, “Hey, Ivona,”

“Dad’s angry,” Owain looked up from scooping out some ice cream. Ivona looked like she was about to cry. She’d attached herself to Ruth’s leg. Ruth looked at

Owain inquisitively, “Something about a letter.”

Owain’s eyes widened, and he checked his pockets. He must have left the letter out. His dad was very much against the idea of conscription. He wasn’t supposed to find out. No, no, no, no, no.

“Owain?” Ruth started to ask, but she was interrupted by the door swinging open and letting in Owain’s dad, cane pounding on the tiled floor ominously.

“What do you mean conscripted?” He said, not quite bellowing, but close, “Did you sign up for this?”

“That’s not how that works,”

“You’re not going!” As he carried on ranting, Owain caught Ruth’s eyes. She’d gone pale as a ghost, her grey eyes were wide. Any hint of her laughter from before had gone completely, “…you are not going down there tomorrow, and that is final! Do you understand?” Owain looked at his dad. He knew that he wasn’t angry at Owain, but at the situation, it didn’t make the fire in his eyes any less concerning though.

“I don’t have a choice, Dad. I’m old enough, and they need soldiers. I’m going, I have to,”

“Where you going to tell any of us?” Both Owain and his Dad were taken by surprise by the small voice that had asked that question, they looked to Ivona but found that she was as surprised and looking up at Ruth.

“I only just got the letter. I was going to tell you, I promise,” Ruth nodded, understanding and sorrow in her eyes.

“I’m not letting you go,” Owain’s dad declared, he carried on mumbling to himself as he turned around and marched down the corridor and out of the flat. Ivona ran over and hugged Owain as tightly as she could. Owain knelt down to be on the same level as his little sister.

“I’ll still have access to a phone, I’ll call you every week. I promise,”

“And you’ll stay safe?” She asked in a voice muffled by his jumper. She was crying.

“I’ll do my best,” He reassured her, hugging her back.

“Hey,” it was Ruth, she was holding a tray with three bowls on it, “Still up for ice cream?” Ivona nodded into Owain’s jumper, “Could you take these through for me?” She asked her. Ivona looked so glad to have something to do, though she was still sniffling. Ivona took the tray and carried it out of the kitchen and into the living room. Owain stood up.

“I was going to say-”

“I know,” Ruth told him, she was hugging herself like she tended to do when she was nervous, “You wanted to go, now you will, just, keep in contact, will you?”

“Of course,” Ruth was just stood there, hugging herself, so Owain made the choice to go over and comfort her.

“Can I hug you?” He asked.

“Please,” It felt like these past days they’d spent most of their time comforting each other. He guessed that was just normal in times like these. After a moment of silence, Ruth spoke, “Ivona will accuse me of getting cooties again.” It was a weak laugh that followed from her as she let go and went to walk through to the living room. She paused, “You’ll stay in one piece, right?”

“I’ll do my best,”

Ruth hesitated, then kissed him on the cheek.

“I’ll keep you to that,” She said unable to meet his eyes. She was blushing furiously and clearly annoyed at the fact. Owain just blinked. She turned around and hurried into the living room. Owain stood in the kitchen for a few seconds, his hand rising to his cheek and touching where she’d kissed him and found that he didn’t really want to leave. But he had to protect them. He had to protect her.

The ice cream was eaten in relative silence, and as soon as Ivona had finished her ice cream, she grabbed the arms of both Owain and Ruth who she was sat between, and hugged them both, leaving them to struggle to eat their ice cream without using those arms.

“You won’t be by yourself,” Ruth said after a little bit, putting down her own finished bowl of salted caramel, “Moses and John will be on that boat,”

“Ruth, I think you forget I grew up in this town. I know everyone who’ll be on that boat.” A little silence as Ivona carried on holding onto them both tightly on the sofa. Ruth gave in, resting her head on Owain’s shoulder after a little hesitation before he nodded to say it would be okay. “I didn’t know your brothers had been conscripted?”

“John wasn’t. He signed up. Moses was going to but got conscripted first. Mum and Dad are too old to sign up and I’m not eligible,” She said that last part a little awkwardly, unable to meet his eyes, instead watching Ivona slowly drifting off.

“Why?” He asked. Ruth tapped her head.

“My brains too funky for the army.”

“And you know this how?” Owain asked. It wasn’t the most usual thing to know about yourself.

“They sent me a letter a couple days ago declaring I would be unfit for conscription. Small blessings in being a little -,” She couldn’t seem to find the word she wanted, so after a second or two, she raised her free hand to her head, twirling a finger, “Y’know? Anyway, they could only call me up to the RAF, and what help would I be there?”

“Are you sure you won’t get a letter like that?” Ivona piped up between them. “I don’t want you to leave.” She held on tighter to Owain, he winced, wondering how long it would take for him to lose all circulation in his arm at this rate.

“I’m as average as they come, there aren’t any exception for me.” He said, immediately regretting. Not because he didn’t agree with what he’d said, but because of the withering look he was getting from Ruth and the doe eyes he was getting from Ivona. “What?”

“No exceptions?” Ivona asked, a sadness in her voice he hadn’t expected for him.

“Average, my foot.” Ruth grumbled, leaning back into the sofa, though not without attempting and mostly failing to kick him in the leg. His thoughts immediately rewound back to the kitchen and he struggled to keep his cool for the second time.

“Look, I know you want to keep me safe, but this is something I wanted to, and have to do. I want to keep you all safe. All my family, all my friends.”

The boats were going to leave in the evening, under the cover of darkness, and the rest of the day couldn’t be spent relaxing and eating ice cream. Ruth had a couple of job interviews to make, and Owain and Ivona had to prepare for their imminent departures, though Owain didn’t see his dad again. He didn’t want to leave on a bad note, and hoped he could find him before departure. That’s why he’d left the house after eating tea with his family. His mum had been similarly distressed by the suddenness of that letter, and his dad’s disappearance hadn’t helped that at all. His dad couldn’t just run away from things he didn’t like. I

It was a cloudy and misty evening, a little chilly for September. Ruth would find it freezing he thought. With both him and Ivona going, he would see if Ruth would be up for looking after Void. She’d gotten much better with Void since the bombing, and Void had gotten much better with humans in general though still seemed to prefer the presence of either him or Ruth, Ivona tended to be a hit or miss.

Owain wasn’t looking where he was going. These paths were well-known to him having walked them since he could walk. He just let his legs take him on autopilot. So, it took him by surprise when he walked into a wall.

He held his nose, blinking away the involuntary tears at the unexpected collision. He looked at the wall in front of him, convinced it had been bombed away. Looking behind himself, he recognised the road he’d been walking on. No pavement, he’d been walking on a dirt road, something Owain had only seen in one area of Sobetween before, an d it was in shambles. The mist around was concealing any other details to help him place where he must’ve ended up. He must be somewhere else.

He could hear voices though. It sounded like a couple talking in hushed voices, like they were trying not to wake someone up.

“Hello?” He called out in a whisper shout, walking towards the noise. “Who’s there?” The talking stopped. “I know it’s ridiculous, but I think I’m a bit lost,” still silence, “I didn’t know there were any dirt paths around here?” He could make out a shadow in the distance, he padded towards it, slowly and deliberatley “Hello?” His breathing was getting heavier, faster. How had this happened? He grew up here? Sobetween wasn’t that big? “Ruth?” He found himself calling, no longer whispering, “Ruth?”

“Owain?” Owain jumped, spinning around, and there was Ruth, behind her a wall that he now recognised as the back of the blue house. There was no dirt road, no whispering people, just the mist, himself, and Ruth.

“Ruth!” He said, “Thank goodness! There was this road, and these people, I didn’t know where I was, and-,” He was talking faster and faster, arms gesticulating all over the place.

“Owain?” Her voice cut through his rambling, “You’ve been gone for hours it’s time to go to the docks,”

“What?” Owain was pretty sure he’d only been out for a little bit, maybe half and hour at most. “What time is it?”

“Time for you to get a watch,”

“Ruth,”

“It’s twenty,” She meant eight pm, she always spoke like that, “Aren’t you supposed to be at the docks by twenty thirty?” She was right. Of course.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right,” Owain said, trying not to let on how unsettled he was.

“Also, your uniform arrived… it looks smart.” They started walking towards the blue house apartment entrance. “We’ll miss you,”

“Me too,” Ruth looked at him strangely at that, “As in, I’ll miss you too. All of you. Run’anor willing, this war will be over quickly, and I can come back to a home I’ve helped to keep safe.”

“We want you to be safe too,” They stopped right before the apartment entrance. “If I could take your place, I would.”

“In that case, I’m glad you can’t.” Owain said with a smile. He pressed in the code to unlock the door and walked in. Ruth stayed still, “Aren’t you coming?”

“I’ve got a few things to grab myself,” She said, hugging herself with one arm. The other hanging, she was fidgeting. She looked so small and frail. He knew that she was strong, all he had to do was look into her grey eyes, shining like comets. She would survive this. He prayed that he would too.

Did he want to leave? No, not really. If the world was perfect, he would stay. He would spend more time with Ruth, with his family. Larry would still be alive, and there would be no war, nothing to protect his home from. However, he didn’t live in a perfect world, and he had a duty to fulfill.

The door closed between them, and Owain hoped that his leaving wouldn’t obliterate any chance of furthering their friendship.  

When Owain saw Ruth again, moments later, he wasn’t in any uniform but he had a suitcase packed with everything he had been informed to bring with him. It wasn’t much. He was smiling. He didn’t want anyone’s memories of him to be dampened by acting grim and moody himself. His smile was genuine for a moment as he laughed to himself, he could leave that to Ruth. Ivona was right behind him, with Mrs.Crawley behind her, carrying Ivona’s suitcase, bigger and more personalised than Owains, full of memories to look at. Mr. McCrawley was still missing. Owain guessed he didn’t want to have to watch his only children be sent away on ships to strange lands.

They walked to Water’s Edge, joining the almost procession of other families taking their family members to the docks, every single child and teen below eighteen was being walked down by their parents, and too many young men and women were also walking down in various uniforms.

“Where’s your uniform?” Ruth asked Owain. He shrugged.

“Mum said she packed it for some reason,” Ruth looked over at Mrs. McCrawley, eyes narrowing, “What’s that look for?”

“No reason.”

Owain hoped that anyone who saw him now would see a young man worthy of his place in the army, to protect his home, conscripted or not. It was raining again, puddles rising across the roads, disrupted and rippling from the many people walking down them. Owain knew it was just a shower, not a storm, he looked sideways at Ruth, who was walking between his family and her own. They’d given up with umbrellas after the third one that blew inside out.

There were two boats under the darkness of the night. One for the evacuees, and one for the soldiers. Many families were there for both, for those families, children would be deposited first, and then the new soldiers.

Ruth awkwardly said her goodbyes to her brothers. She hugged them both, but to any onlookers, it looked like it could be the first time either of them had ever hugged each other. She watched them board the boat, holding back the tears. Owain had seen that face far too many times for his liking. They had waited for her before dropping off Ivona, considering Ivona refused to go a step further without Ruth there.

Ruth crouched down to Ivona’s level, and Owain saw her give Ivona something that he couldn’t make out. Right after whatever it was had exchanged hands, Ivona hugged Ruth, and wouldn’t let go, until Ruth gently coaxed her away. Ivona had done that with all of them already, her little face streaked with tears, but now she was attempting to put on a brave face that looked a lot like Ruths. They waved Ivona on to the boat, until she was out of sight. She’d joined up with some of her friends, Owain was happy to see. He went to go to the other line, but was stopped when he heard Ruth ask his mum a strange question.

“What are you hiding?” She asked this softly, in a tone Owain wasn’t accustomed to. It was like she knew something, and now she had mentioned it, his mum did seem to be hiding something. His uniform for one. His mum started crying.

“Mum?” He looked at Ruth, rushing over to support his mum, his eyes were wide and confused, “What happened? What did you do?” Ruth seemed to ignore him.

“It’s Mr. McCrawley, isn’t it?” She said

“What?” Owain asked. His mum nodded.

“He’s already gone. He said it was for the best,”

“What was for the best, mum?” Owain asked, doing what he could to comfort her.

“Ivona was going, and then you too? It was too much, we couldn’t lose you both.” Realisation had clearly dawned for Ruth, Owain still didn’t understand.

“What did you do?” He asked.

“I’m not sorry, Owain. It was his choice to make,”

“What choice?” Owain asked.

“Owain,” Ruth said quietly, “The only person who can take the place of someone conscripted in Ahlden is a family member,” He stared at her, then at his mum, and then at the boat.

"That's not true," Owain said, he didn't believe it. That would be ridiculous,"

"I looked it up when I got home," Ruth said, "It's the only way out unless you're like me and unfit."

“No,” He said, “No, no, no, no, no!” Not thinking, he ran down the pier, as far as he could until he was prevented from going any further by soldier’s guarding their boat.

“You can’t go any further,”

“You don’t understand,” He said, looking around him wildly. People were watching him. He could see the pity in their eyes. He didn’t want that pity, “I’m supposed to be on that boat,”

“We already have a Mr. McCrawley onboard,”

“He wasn’t the one conscripted, I was, let me on! Let me on!” His mum had come up beside him; Ruth was watching from where she was stood before.

“Owain, come back, it’s done,” His mum coaxed him. He could hear the tears on her voice.

“No!” He shouted, struggling against the people he had known since he was a kid who stood in uniform like he was a stranger. He could hear the tears on his own voice. At some point, he let his mum pull him away, and he had started crying in earnest.

He looked to the boat, trying to see his dad amongst all the soldiers of all the ages. He had never considered his dad going to war, not with his condition, but apparently it wasn’t enough to keep him away from danger.

“Dad!” He called out, seeing him at the railings.

“Look after them, Owain,” He heard called back to him, “We’ll keep them safe together.” Owain collapsed onto the ground, kneeling on the cobbled street. As a son, he clearly hadn’t fallen far from the tree.